It ’s apple season again , and the securities industry are make full up with varieties bearing lovely name , fromhoneycrisptoautumn glory , with plentitude of variant ongold , sweet , delicious , sun , andbeautyin between . But not all apples are into being judged by some bastard - grin , beauty - queen touchstone . Some apples do n’t need to keep wave you down with a name that is really just a desperate cry of “ look how yummy I am ! Do n’t I calculate pretty ? ” Here are 18 varieties that , candidly , do n’t worry what you think . They know their Charles Frederick Worth and do n’t involve to act all precious . They are n’t bad apple , but they are badass .

1. STARK’S EARLIEST

Gets more done before the closing of September than you do all twelvemonth .

2. SPARTAN

Stands there in the frost without a password of complaint .

3. BLOODY PLOUGHMAN

They say in 19th century Scotland a gamekeeper shot down a plower who was stealing some apples . Those apple , throw on a trash lot , spud a seedling , and that ’s how the bloody ploughman lived on .

4. COEUR DE BOEUF

That ’s right , “ heart of bitch . ” And if that does n’t sound delicious to you , your loss .

5. DOG’S SNOUT

Yeah , that’swhat it looks like . You get a trouble with that ?

6. RAZOR RUSSET

Comes from Kentucky and ai n’t divert by you .

7. TINA CRAB APPLE

Will also contract you .

8. WINTERSTEIN

dusty and dingy as winter , heavy and unfeeling as gem .

9. NONNETIT BASTARD

Nonnetit prick … NONNETIT BASTARD .

10. NEW ROCK PIPPIN

Not your father ’s rock-and-roll .

11. PURITAN

No time for your apple - curtsy frivolities .

12. TREMLETT’S BITTER

Has visualize too much of this world to be sweet .

13. LEATHER COAT

seize with teeth it .

14. WYKEN PIPPIN

For wycked wyccan womyn .

15. GLOCKENAPFEL

Thinks you ’re a dummkopf .

16. RUSTY COAT

tough than lockjaw .

17. AMERICAN MOTHER

You lay a hand on her seedlings , she will crush you like a cider imperativeness .

18. UTTWILER SPÄTLAUBER

splendid storability . big metal umlaut .

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